3 Effective Ways to Get Good at Saying No

1. Stop telling yourself that you can’t say no

If you keep telling yourself something it reinforces the belief that it must be true. Next time you catch yourself saying, or thinking

I’m not good at saying No, do the following:

Don’t try to push that thought away because resisting it will only make it stronger. Instead, notice the thought and follow it up with something like

“I haven’t been good at saying ‘No’, but I’m learning how to get better at it now”
 

2. Learn to Shut up!

Sometimes communication is simply about handing someone a message. Full stop. They may come back with an opposing point of view - but letting go of the need to engage in conversation about it is very powerful indeed.  If you’re clear in your mind about what you want to say, you only really need to say it once, possibly twice.

If you keep saying the same thing over and over, the other person just hears nagging and white noise. So just say what you need to say, and then shut up! 

3. Transferable No’s 

If you find it difficult to say No to a specific person, or in specific situations, start a practice of saying No to smaller things.

I’m not suggesting you stubbornly say ‘No’ to every little request but consider those times when you automatically say ‘Yes’ where you could say ‘No’.

Practice your small ‘No’s and your subconscious will get used to the idea that saying ‘No’ is an ok and normal thing to do.

It will also prepare others for the more challenging ‘No’s’

These are simple tips but start practicing them now, and you’ll see a big difference in your confidence, your relationships, your success – all of your life!