In my experience as a therapist I’ve found that people often don't recognise the power of self-acceptance, and how it can change their lives in remarkable ways. They think of self-acceptance either in vague terms not really understanding what that means, OR they think it means indulging in oneself.
Self-acceptance means loving yourself as you are, your strengths, your weaknesses and all that comes in between. It means being completely comfortable in your own skin. It means rather than regretting your weaknesses, you see these as things you can work on to lead a more fulfilling and confident life.
Practicing Self-Acceptance Will Make Your Relationships Much Better
If you often rely on others to make you feel good enough, you’ll end up feeling rejected and unhappy. This isn’t because other people are unkind; it's simply because they’re human beings who have good days, stressful days and their own needs to focus on.
When you stop chasing after approval from others and start providing it for yourself, you’ll feel much more confident and at ease. Your relationships become the icing on the cake, rather than your only source of validation. That means you’ll feel more confident and at ease with others - so your relationships will automatically improve.
When you stop chasing after approval from others and start providing it for yourself, you’ll feel much more confident and at ease– that means you’ll feel more confident and at ease with others too - so your relationships will automatically improve.
Practicing Self-Acceptance Helps With Your Work
The world of work very often requires creative solutions to challenges and problems. When you try to push and prove yourself, you put yourself under stress. Then the part of your brain called the Amygdala (that controls the fight, flight or freeze response), becomes activated because it thinks you’re at risk in some way. It's primary concern is to get you out of some perceived danger, so your ability to think creatively will simply freeze up because there are more important things to focus on!
When you relax and accept yourself as doing your best, you’ll find solutions seem to come out of nowhere. That’s your creative energy flowing because the amygdala has no need to put you into fight, flight or freeze. You’ll be much more effective in your working life.
Practicing Self-Acceptance Helps You Achieve Your Dreams
When you try to resist those aspects of yourself you don’t like by judging and criticising yourself, saying ‘I’m no good,’ ‘I’m wrong,’ ‘I should do better,’ you’re just making those negative ideas about yourself seem bigger and more powerful, and therefore your sense of being able to achieve your dreams seems impossible.
On the other hand, if you choose not to pay those thoughts much attention, they become less potent and so they simply can’t block the path to your success.
This all comes together beautifully.
Because self-acceptance gives you better relationships, you’ll have more support from others to help you achieve your dreams.
Because self-acceptance enhances your creativity, you’ll be more able to reach your working goals
Because self-acceptance stops negativity you’ll be free to go forward and achieve your dreams.
Stop Being So Hard On Yourself
So the next time you're being hard on yourself, remember the way forward is not from beating yourself up and berating yourself for failings.
The way forward is from practicing self-acceptance. Try this way of being and watch your life change like magic.
Many people struggle with people-pleasing, setting boundaries and learning to speak up.
The answer lies in first understanding what true assertiveness is, then identifying the areas that you need to work on.
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