Do you always try to smooth things over? Do you give up your time and energy to keep others happy? Maybe you find yourself saying yes, when you really want to say no? 

If so, you’re not alone. Many people have this experience.

The problem is that it can lead to you being unheard, taken for granted and maybe even disrespected. You don't get the best from life, and your relationships aren't happy.

But it doesn't have to be this way.

what Readers are saying about how kind people get tough

5.0 out of 5 stars  


A must read!

I highly recommend this book. It's full of insight and case studies that are very relatable.
Read this book to change your life for the better. It's a good book to dip back into as well. Well done to the author for another fabulous book.

5.0 out of 5 stars  

Absolutely fantastic read!

All I can say is this book has been one of the best in it`s field that I have ever read.
It`s a modern day elite toolkit for surviving life. Very well done Marléne!

5.0 out of 5 stars  


I highly recommend this book.

I couldn't put this book down. The author doesn't overwhelm you with too much information- each section is easy to understand and you are instilled with an understanding of the correct ways to become more assertive.
I very soon noticed a difference in my own communications with others when I practised the given techniques.

5.0 out of 5 stars  

A powerful life changing book.

Such a well written book with layers of support in the advice and case studies. so helpful for all kinds of relationships and communication.
Marlene’s 2nd book is a must have for successful communication and outcomes in life.
Thank you

5.0 out of 5 stars  

A really helpful book for all people pleasers!

I found this book very helpful in understanding how I can develop my personal and my professional relationships.

The book opened my eyes to the concept of kindness as 'Misguided Kindness' or 'Conscious Kindness'. It made me aware that there are times when we’re doing something, thinking it is the kind thing to do, when in fact it isn’t helpful for the other person, ourselves, or the relationship.

5.0 out of 5 stars  


What an amazing read this book is. The author has given those of us who struggle with confidence issues the tools to change our lives around and become the person we've always wanted to be.

Thank you for your words of wisdom Marléne. I will always be grateful.

What would it feel like if:

  • When someone makes demands on your time and energy you could say 'no' with confidence, and without feeling guilty.
  • In all your relationships, you were able to courageously speak up, voice your needs, be heard respected and valued.
  • When someone was disrespectful to you, you were able to confidently tell them that their behaviour is not acceptable, without fear of their reaction..
  • You were able to stop feeling overly responsible for your grown-up son or daughter and set them on a path of maturity without feeling guilty.
  • At work or in business, you were naturally respected and highly valued.
  • You were no longer drowning in the needs of others and had time and energy to pursue your own dreams and desires.

Your relationships will become deeper and more meaningful.

You'll become more authentic and feel confident in your own skin.

You'll no longer feel concerned about what other people think of you.

You feel strong, calm and centred in your own happiness rather than being at the whim of others' moods.

People will begin to treat you with the same kindness and respect that you give to them.

You'll start attracting more people into your life who value you without question.

'When you give to yourself you can give to others in a truly authentic way. This is how we heal our world - by starting with ourselves.'

Marléne Rose Shaw Therapist

Based on over 25 years of teaching people how to say no, find the courage to speak up, ask for respect and have much better relationships.

How Kind People Get Tough is packed full of case studies, tools, tips, and techniques. This much-loved book also includes your free Companion Resources to help you put those skills into practice.

what other Authors are saying about how kind people get tough:

Michael J. Chase, Bestselling Author & Founder of The Kindness Center
'A timely book with a timeless message, How Kind People Get Tough is more than just a blueprint for kinder living.  At its core, it also reminds us to stand firmly yet kindly within our power. Your heart and your relationships will be stronger after reading it.'

— Michael J. Chase, Bestselling Author & Founder of The Kindness Center

'Marlene Rose Shaw's book "How Kind People get Tough" is a wonderful handbook for kind people who desire more confidence and relationships that feel good.
She dispels the myth that kindness is a good thing and assertiveness is not, and helps us to understand clearly what is meant by each of those terms. As a sensitive person, I loved learning that assertiveness includes being authentic, focusing on love, and seeking a win-win outcome. Many sensitive introverts find it extremely difficult to set boundaries, be assertive, and put their own needs ahead of others'.  This book will be a game changer for them!
She helps us recognize some reasons behind the reluctance to come across as mean or aggressive. Best of all, the book provides excellent, down to earth guidance and methods to gain respect, be heard, and create relationships that work.
The "Intentional life plan" in the book is a practical value-add that I can't wait to share with my clients!'

Liesel Teversham Savvy Self Growth 

Liesel Teversham
Wendy Fry ~ Author of Write from Your Heart
'How Kind People Get Tough in short, is a life plan to live by—guiding the reader to be true to themselves and to learn how to be assertive.  
The beauty of the book is it offers a companion course so the reader can stay on track to living life consciously and making positive, healthy choices. The contents include assertive communication tools, tips and techniques for more positive and happier relationships.  
Be kind to yourself, build your confidence in saying yes to you and buy this book.  You’ll be glad you did.' 
Wendy Fry ~ Author of Write from Your Heart
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