Couples Counselling is a specific area of counselling which requires specialised training and qualifications. With a Post Graduate Diploma in Couples Counselling, I’m fully qualified to help you with your relationship problems.
When you first meet a partner, life feels wonderful; your relationship is effortless and it’s easy to expect that it will always be that way. However, as time goes on, difficulties and worries can begin to make your relationship feel like hard work.
Your first step on the path to a better relationship
The very first step on the path to a better relationship is to understand that our relationships are where we do our best “life learning”. They are the context in which we can become our wisest self.
Because every person has their own individual past, and their own way of viewing the world, it’s inevitable that a relationship will have friction and disharmony at times. This is perfectly normal. Learning to overcome those challenges can be an opportunity to grow as a person, and to become stronger as a couple.
Not just for today – but on into the future.
What sort of problems do people bring to couples counselling?
Couples bring a variety of problems into therapy. Often a mix of the following:
Influences from outside the relationship: extended family,ex-partners, cultural differences, affairs
The impact of the past: limiting beliefs, fears, values
Practical issues: communication skills, time management, sexual problems, boundary setting etc
Here’s a list of some typical things clients say to me. Perhaps some of them will be familiar to you too:
- We can’t stop bickering
- It feels like we’re miles apart
- One of us works away from home and its hard to adjust back into family life
- He doesn’t understand how I feel
- We can’t seem to find the love we once had
- I can’t forgive him/her
- I don’t know how to trust
- She wants children but I don’t
- He doesn’t get on with my son/daughter
- My stepchild doesn’t respect me
- The ex is intruding on our relationship
- She still wants to hang out with her ex and I don’t trust him
- His, or her, family doesn’t approve of me
- I don’t know why he, or she, keeps lying to me
- It’s like talking to a brick wall!
Why can’t we overcome our relationship problems by ourselves?
It’s likely that you’ve made several attempts at getting your relationship back on track- but even though you resolve things for a while, those problems keep popping back up –it can feel like quite a struggle.
It’s often the case that those problems are actually symptoms of deeper issues. With the help of a trained and experienced therapist, you can discover how those deeper issues may be impacting your relationship. Most importantly you can learn proven methods: tools and techniques to get past those issues – quickly and in ways that last.
Will we have homework in between sessions?
Yes, I may give you worksheets to fill out, or suggest exercises for you to practice between sessions. Often couples find this very useful. It is an integral part of you working on your relationship.
Do you offer extra resources?
Yes, as part of your therapy, you have free Client Level Membership to the website.
Here you can login and access resources which accompany our therapeutic work, as well as extra materials for your general interest.
These include worksheets, videos, audios, suggested reading materials. You will also have access to Discount Codes which enable you to purchase the paid courses - free of charge.
People very often find these additional resources an invaluable help. They can be an integral part of overcoming what is troubling you and learning new skills for the happier, and more confident, future you.
Do we have to be married to come for couples counselling?
No, you do not have to be married. The only requirement is that you are in a relationship. I welcome couples in any kind of relationship, heterosexual, gay or lesbian; married or co-habiting; pre-living together, separating or divorcing; with or without children.
What if my partner doesn't want to come for the sessions?
If you are worried about your relationship, but your partner wont come for sessions, you are absoultely welcome to come along as an individual client.
What if we decide we want to end the relationship?
Sometimes couples come to the conclusion that they are better off separating. Even though living apart, many people will continue to have a relationship; it's just a differentkind of relationship, and especially if you have children.
It’s important that you find ways to get along in your new circumstances.
Counselling sessions can help you negotiate this and find better ways of getting along for the future.
How can I find out more about the cost of sessions, the length of sessions etc?
There's an FAQ page for you right here Couples FAQ's
How to get in touch with me
I offer face-to-face counselling and therapy sessions in Miraflores, Riviera del Sol, Malaga, Spain
I also offer online sessions across the globe via Skype or Zoom